A common question (usually accompanied by fear/uncertainty) is about your personal vows.
In Australia, you must exchange very basic legal vows (to make your marriage legal) and there is also an opportunity to share personal vows with each other.
Some people assume these words must be a masterpiece, must be wow-worthy and must reduce all of your guests to mushy tears. And to be honest, if personal vows are written from the heart, they are usually all of the above without even trying. The good news is that your personal vows are only for two people. The two people getting married. My advice is to not try and write something that is going to impress everyone else. Your vows are your words to your person. Simple!
These are my top tips to help you with personal vows:
1. Speak from the heart
2. Sure, Google ideas, but try and make your vows your words
3. Speak in a language you’d usually use – the real you. You don’t need to write a Pulitzer Prize winning piece. Chances are, you’re going to have a few nerves on your wedding day, if you then have to speak vows in a language you’re not familiar with, it’s going to make it feel 10000% harder. And your guests and your person are going to know they’re not your words.
4. There are no rules – make them meaningful to you both.
5. By all means share them with me and keep them a surprise for each other. I will have a quick look at them side by side to check for consistency in length and tone. Absolutely no issue if they are different but at the very least it gives me a chance to give you a heads up in case you want to change a few things.
6. If you have a mental block, take a step back. Make dot points. If you can’t put those dot points into vows that you’re happy with, send them through. I can work through them with you.
7. Try not to leave them to the last minute!